Sunday, May 11, 2008

Questions for the Producers of the New G.I. Joe Movie


1. Um, yeah, that guy? Not exactly giving off a "Destro" vibe.

2. Heavy Duty? HEAVY DUTY?! Are you kidding me? I'm going to ask the same question kids across America asked when the character of Heavy Duty debuted back in 1991:

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO ROADBLOCK?

For those unfamiliar with the G.I. Joe roster, the post of heavy machine gun expert was filled by two enormous black men with shaved heads. You could tell them apart because Roadblock was the one with a personality and an interesting backstory and tremendous popularity among the fans, and Heavy Duty had NOTHING.

Never mind the uproar over rumors of the downplaying of the Joes' American-ness, the "international strike force headquartered in Switzerland" angle, and the casting of Marlon Wayans in an action movie. You sumbitches picked Heavy Duty over Roadblock, and I ain't havin' it.

5 comments:

Doc Mizzle said...

Ok I've been holding back from saying it but doesn't this guy make you think he's going to send Milli Vanilli Vampires after Neo and Morpheus?

eris404 said...

But that's Christopher Eccleston - he is awesome! I'm just wondering what incriminating evidence they have on him. The only reason why he would do this movie must be blackmail...

Doc Mizzle said...

That would be true but that isn't "Destro" is what oil is saying. I think we have learned recently that you don't always have to cave to the nostalgia freaks out there BUT a metal mask would be cool as shit.

Banana Oil said...

DDestro with two D's for a double dose of this pimpin.

Doc Mizzle said...

Ok dude, Now you gotta post the pic. If Eccleston could wear that Destro suit...